Kamis, 07 Agustus 2008

Tears and more tears

Amber Canyon
Morning Meditation

Freaking out this morning because it looks like the Flickr account is going to be toast...

Feeling sadness, grief, angst over losing the picture blogs and thinking I'll probably just ditch the whole blogging idea.

All or nothing - I know - but my "stuff" is up and running big time today. Feeling desperately unnecessary, unlovable, and messed up. So, it was in this condition that I sat down for my morning meditation.

I opened to the little shaman I visited not so long ago, and he looked at me with so much grandfatherly compassion...

I hugged him, and buried my face in his chest and I cried. But not for real. Here in the physical, tears remain unshed, and now I have to go to work. If i could just cry, I know I would feel better, but I won't - so there's that.

NOTE: Actually, I did cry... I cried on the way to work, I cried at work, and I came home from work early and cried some more. My "little spartan boy" was appalled, but I did feel better... eventually.

What is the Morning Meditation?

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